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Empathy and Sympathy


Empathy and Sympathy

Writers often confuse empathy and sympathy. These two words are similar in meaning, but they are not the same. If you use the wrong one, you will either change the meaning of your sentence or be spotted as someone who doesn't know the difference.

Empathy

The noun empathy denotes the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. This ability usually derives from having shared the same, or a similar, experience. For example, you can have empathy for a poor person if you are, or were, poor. More examples:

  • I have empathy for your problem. I've been there.

  • Empathy is at the heart of the actor's art. (Meryl Streep)

  • The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy. (also Meryl Streep)

  • Friendship is a living thing that lasts only as long as it is nourished with kindness, empathy and understanding. (anon)

The corresponding verb is to empathise:

  • I can empathise with you. I've been there.

  • He will empathise with you. He managed the same department for ten years.

Sympathy

The noun sympathy denotes feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else's misfortune. For example:

  • You have my utmost sympathy. You trained like a demon for that race.

  • I would like to extend my sympathy to your son. I'm very sorry to hear of the death of his goldfish.

The corresponding verb is to sympathise:

  • The vicar will sympathise with you. She knows how hard you trained.

  • (There is no suggestion the vicar has trained hard herself (that would be empathise not sympathise). As a result, the preposition 'with' does not feel right with to sympathise because sympathising usually means you haven't experienced the bad event yourself. 'With' seems a better fit for empathise. However, it is used with both verbs.)

Sympathy is not always about feelings of pity and sorrow. It can also mean to understand or to agree with. It carries a connotation of not full support. For example:

  • It's hard not to have sympathy with their claims.

  • It's clear from her inaction that she sympathises with their cause.


 
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